They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
