Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
