All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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