You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
