thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
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