Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
