Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
