Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
