Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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