the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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