Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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