oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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