YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
