I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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