he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize