i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize