i love accidental penises.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
