Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize