She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
