Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
