did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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