Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
