Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we made out on top of his cat.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
