Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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