yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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