If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
