Already got asked if we're dating
My room smells like vodka and shame
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
