I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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