Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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