I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize
