Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
