question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize