someone owes me an orgasm
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
