New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it glows. i had to have it.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
