***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
