I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
