i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
