so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
