I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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