Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize