yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
