Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize