Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Houston, we have a squirter
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
