So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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