you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
