Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
