I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
