No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize