fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
