just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
