and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
